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The Power of the NO TRAIN

Updated: Aug 4

Knowing when to let clients go or not even accept them at all.

Have you ever felt the state of overwhelm behind the chair?! Grinding it out and taking orders from guests who obviously don't respect you as an Artist and Stylist? She arrives with box colored hair and has created an entire Pinterest board of gorgeous women with platinum blonde hair? This particular guest wants to lift 8+ levels in one session and according to her reality, it's as easy as 1-2-3. You explain to her that this is impossible without turning her hair into wet spinach...and give her the honest why's. You try and maintain the integrity and yet you find yourself somehow agreeing to the task. You've blocked off only 2. 5 hours, so you re-arrange your schedule and you try and maintain a professional positive attitude.

The biggest mistake we make as Stylists is that we haven't learned the power of NO. First, it's natural to want to help but the voice inside your gut is screaming "don't do it.". Possibly you need the cash and you think, well 4+ hours of labor isn't so bad.


This used to be me. Which is why all my new guests have are required a consultation first. Here's the thing. There's only one you and 4 hours of labor isn't worth the energy-sucking if the client doesn't trust you or respect your job.


I feel the same for the women that arrive at the salon that have spent hours on social media and tell me that they want Russian hair because they saw that the Kardashians are wearing it! SMH. I explain that Russian hair is too fine and not a match for her DNA. It's a texture thing! She just can't seem to wrap their head around it. It's during those moments, we have to learn to honor ourselves by saying "no". The fit is wrong. I am not for her and visa versa. This person isn't listening to my expert advice and if I provided her with Russian hair she would eventually become a headache. You see if I gave her what she wanted and she wouldn't be happy anyways! She's just that type of person. And I can't sugarcoat the realness of this story.


For example. A long time client returned to the states after a 4-year hiatus. She came in asking for a particular brand of extensions. She has dense hair that resembles over-processed Asian hair. Although I was elated to see her, it was obvious I wasn't telling her what she wanted to hear. I kept mentioning her hair was too dense for European hair extensions and that the only way it would work is if she flat ironed her natural hair all the time. I am not a huge fan of heat damage and her hair was already compromised beyond the norm. Her beautiful face did this puppy dog, deer in the headlights "sorta thing". Needless to say, I caved and said ok. The end result was she left the salon looking amazing because I styled her. BUT two weeks later the text messages started at 5:30 a.m. It was as though she didn't hear a word I said during the initial consultation. I would see her name on my phone and instantly I felt anxiety. In the end, she returned 4 months later to have them removed and I learned a valuable lesson. No amount of profit is worth all the emotional tax. I'd rather focus on those that trust me because it's easier on us all.

It's only by saying "no", that you concentrate on the things that are really important.

-Steve Jobs


I am all about protecting your energy and creating your own blue ocean. I'll write about the Blue Ocean Strategy another time. But if you're curious check out the book, it's a total game-changer.











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